"Because I knew you"

"I've heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason..." ~ "For Good" from the musical "Wicked".

I am such a musical geek. I've seen Wicked four times, and this is my favorite song. I cry almost every time I hear it. Not just because the words resonate with me and I'm such a sentimental wuss, but I'm also drawn to a memory of Rachel and Robyn singing this duet at a recital a few years ago. I was reduced to a blubbering, sobbing mess when I heard them. They were brilliant! (A non-biased opinion of course! ;-))
The words of the song make me think about how I can apply them to many people who have crossed my path during my life. It is so amazing to me how much some of these people have influenced and changed the course and the direction in which I was traveling. Is it fate, or is it chance? I believe it's fate, but also, that we have control over the choices that we make in response to these relationships and their affect on us. (One of the important lessons that we try to impart on our Girls on the Run group!)
A few weeks ago, I met an old friend Ginney, for lunch. We had not seen each other in 27 years! We were best friends for awhile in high school. We met during a play called "The Admirable Crichton" As fate would have it, that's when I first met Mike. He was in the play as well. He was a senior, I was a junior, and she, along with my brother Larry, were sophomores. She was a really good actress, and Mike was great...and hysterical! The play was an English comedy...and it was a BUST! Nobody understood the humor, and the only people who would even attempt an English accent were Mike and Ginney. The ONLY laugh we got was when Mike ad-libbed and did some crazy dance during a scene. And...this is the God's honest truth....my Mother said after the play, "He is it for you and that's who you will marry!" I thought she had lost her mind. "We are JUST FRIENDS!", I said. She said, "Ugh huh, okay?". She reminds me of this conversation quite often! ;-)
We were all friends by the end of the play. We were one big geaky group of theater dorks and we had the BEST time! Ginney and I became really close, and Mike was so sweet, and funny, and generous, and beyond smart. But, he was...well...a geak!! And I had a crush on Ray Gibbs, who was the Admirable Crichton. He was tall, dark, charming, a football player, and also hilarious. He and Mike were friends before the play, and boy was Ray MAD that Mike was getting all the laughs!
It was prom season, and I was waiting for Ray to ask me to go. Mike asked me instead. Apparently he had a bit of a crush on me! :-O But....I wanted to go with Ray! I said no. He then asked Ginney, who said yes. Ray asked someone else. Guess who sat home on prom night eating 1/2 gallon of ice cream in my PJ's? :-S
A few weeks before prom, my fickle 16 year old mind began to feel a bit differently towards Mike. He was really kind of handsome in a geaky sort of way, and he was amazingly sweet. I was falling hard and the feeling was mutual. The day after prom, he came over and asked me out. That was May 7th, 1983, the day of our first kiss. I wonder how many there have been since? :-)
Ginney and I remained friends after that, and during my senior year, she played Abby and I played Martha in "Arsenic and Old Lace". Larry even joined us in the play and again we had the best time! But after I graduated, Ginney and I lost touch, as happens so often when lives and interests change. Last summer, my brother saw Ginney at their High School reunion. They talked and she asked about me and how I was doing. She was amazed that Mike and I were still together! And....she's a runner!! She's done a few marathons and is itching to do more. She is married, has a wonderful career, and a few well-loved pooches. We connected on Facebook and made plans to meet.
I was NERVOUS! So much has happened during the time that we were together last. I was willing my fuzzy brain to remember how it was, what our dynamic was like, what SHE was like. When I saw her, I was so impressed. She seriously looked amazing! She was beautiful and looked BETTER than in high school. After exchanging hugs and greetings, we started talking...and didn't stop for 3 hours! I can't say the memories came flooding back, and it was sort of strange for me. I felt like she was a distant, but familiar stranger that I was just getting to know again. It was intimidating how articulate and smart she was. I was struggling with a fuzzy brain day and was having a hard time conveying my thoughts and feelings in the right way. So frustrating! However, after I relaxed, and we poured over our high school year book, and the conversation turned to running, the fog cleared. 3 hours later, we were making plans to meet at Crazy Legs, which she will be in town for.
On the drive home, I was thinking about all the friends that have come and gone, and how my life had changed as a direct result of haven known them. I became a little sad. Why is it so hard to maintain these friendships that, in the moment, are so important and meaningful? Will all of my friends, that I love to pieces and are in my life right now continue to be with me 10 years from now? I though of my friend Jenny, who I worked with years ago at the hospital, and all that we experienced together at that time. She dared me to run Crazy Legs in 2002, when I couldn't run more than 2 miles. She was there for my first marathon. She made me volunteer with her at this insane event called Ironman Wisconsin. She now has 3 young children and I haven't seen her in two years.
I thought of Theresa, by best friend during my "horsey" years. We shared everything horse related, took lessons together, went to shows and clinics. She even had her horse at our place for a few years. After I started running seriously and she moved her horse to a different barn, we lost our connection. I haven't seen her for a few years.
I thought about Mike. He alone is the one person, other than family, that has been with me since I've been 16 years old. We are both VERY different than we were back in our geaky drama days. How is it that this relationship continues despite all of the years, and challenges, and differences in interests and outlook? At times it has been a struggle for us to stay connected since the girls are up and out, and we seem to lead two very different lives. We talk about this all the time. We do what we've always done...realize that what we love and are committed to takes work to maintain. It takes sacrifice and understanding. It's this way with all of our relationships, whether it be with our family, friends, pets, jobs, and interests. And the biggest challenge that I always come back to....time. There is never enough of it, and that alone forces me to make choices and set priorities. Unfortunately, relationships fall victim to the choices I make. There is only so much time...
Mike and I leave today to visit Rachel in CT. I should be packing right now, but my mind has been filled with these thoughts for awhile and I needed to purge. My next post will be about Rachel time and Beluga's!!
Enjoy this day! :-)